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Post by Red on Sept 16, 2006 18:42:08 GMT -5
Be nice.
I happen to think that Snake getting his ass kicked by Link was very befitting.
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Post by Chain Smoker on Sept 16, 2006 20:37:25 GMT -5
I made the worst scenario on purpose, just to see whether you would try to defend Snake by calling it the worst scenario. It's like cyclic definitions. Nobody knows what I'm talking about, and that includes me.
Ryan
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Post by AoD on Sept 17, 2006 11:33:12 GMT -5
Okay, Link and Snake are staring eachother down, the crowd all watching in the amphi-theatre seats. The first person to make a move is Snake, and he pulls out his SOCOM, and aims at Link. Both with extreme caution, has thier hands ready and free for action. Snake shoots, and link reflects it back at Snake. Snake is wounded, but luckily he has a bandage, and goes into the menu to use it. Link then notices one of Snake's fans, a naked man, yelling out, "I LOVE YOU, SNAKE!" It is Raiden, one of many Snake fans. He is doing cartweels and strange things to cheer for Snake. While Link is destracted, Snake comes up and shoves his pack of cigarettes down Link's throat. Link leans over, choking. Snake was not suprised by Raiden, having seeing him naked many times before. Link then spits up the cigs and uses his Ocarina of Time to call his horse Epona into the battle. She jumps from the crowd into the arena, and Link jumps on her. He rides around, and shooting his arrow at Snake, forgets all about the Gorman Brothers and he doesn't protect Cremia's shipment of milk to the town. "Damn!" thought Link as he fired shots rapidly at Snake. Snake easily dodges them, having someone who can actually control the crappy camera angles play as him. One reflects off of Snake's gun and is richocheted into Zelda. She falls into the Arena. Snake and Link look at each other, and run to assist her. They team up and get Zelda working with a few bandages and a health faerie. They both shake each others hands and call it a draw. But then, out of the audience springs Chuck Norris and he lands behind Link, grabbing his head and snapping the neck. Snake is startled, and starts firing upon Norris. Chuck backs him into a wall with Snake saying, "Why won't you DIE!?!" Chuck grabs him around the neck, and snaps his too. He then grabs Zelda and says, "Let's go baby." She says, "Finally, those two losers are out of my damn life. Now let's go do it nasty!" CHUCK WINS IT ALL AND GETS LUCKY!!!!!!
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Post by adamskafan on Sept 17, 2006 11:37:15 GMT -5
Except... Chuck Norris fits nowhere into the picture.
Dude, Snake and/or link would totally rip Chuck a new one. Chuck Norris jokes USED to be funny. Not any more. Because anyone can take on Chuck if they have Bruce Lee's book, "How to fuck up white people."
It includes 1001 touches of death attacks.
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Post by Red on Sept 17, 2006 11:41:25 GMT -5
Hmmmmm... I am white, but I have yet to be "fucked up" by Bruce Lee.
The book must be hard to come by...
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Post by adamskafan on Sept 17, 2006 11:42:19 GMT -5
Dreadfully hard. They only sell it to asian kids.
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Post by Red on Sept 17, 2006 11:42:59 GMT -5
Hmmmmm... I have asian friends... OH SHIT! WHAT IF THEY WANT TO FUCK ME UP!?!?
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Post by adamskafan on Sept 17, 2006 11:44:10 GMT -5
That's the whole point. Gain your trust. I saw it in the bowels of an asian shark. He was obviously going to eat every chapter after mastering the techniques.
Sad to say, sharks have no fingers, and thusly, the 1001 touches are useless.
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Post by Red on Sept 17, 2006 11:51:44 GMT -5
Wow...
What if I genetically altered the shark to have fingers... then we'd have ASIAN SHARKS ON THE LOOSE!
OH GOD, I'M A MADMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Post by AoD on Sept 17, 2006 11:54:24 GMT -5
Yes, but Chuck has the book, "1001 Ways to Counter-Attack Asians." He is one crazy-ass mother fucker.
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